Aut Aut

I wanted to get back a little on the support that is given to families of autistic children.

I think I forgot to stress that we, as a family, have been very lucky throughout the years with all the help we have been given.  I am quite sure that a lot of people have had a more difficult time, long waiting lists and no proper school for their child.

When Margot was diagnosed 8 years ago, we hardly had to wait to be invited to what I would call "homecoming" sessions (VVA) with four other couples.  It was great to find other families facing the same educational problems with their child and to be given very helpful hints as how to cope.

Shortly afterwards we were visited during a couple of months, every two weeks, by a homecounselor (VVA), trying to get our familylife organized in a way that would make it easier for Margot.  He also took care of informing her sister in a very understandable way.  We were also very lucky that we live in a small village and that the elementary school Margot attended was very protective and willing to adapt its ways to make it easier for her.

The VVA (Association for Autism) also has people giving very "hands on" lectures for relatives and friends, so we took advantage of that opportunity as well to inform the parents of her classmates.  That also made it easier.

It must be said that the VVA really has a lot of material and people working to improve the awareness and to teach people on autism.  We found all their initiatives to be, either for free, or at least very low budget.

I do realize however, that over the last few years waiting lists have grown and that it might not be as easy to get all this help.

After elementary school, with adolescence, things became a bit more complicated.. the difference between Margot and kids her age, is becoming bigger.  After two years in a regular high school, with a person coming in twice a week (GON) to help her survive in a very chaotic environment, we changed to the school where she is now.

I have always turned to professional help when necessary.  So when times got rough in our family, we had the opportunity to call on a special "mental health counselor" who has been trying to teach her how to control her anger and aggression.

I am quite aware that with the school we choose for Margot, we are very lucky.  The autism-friendliness and the professionalism in coping and helping is really amazing.  What I like the most in the school's approach is the open relationship with the parents.  The school organizes meetings as well for parents to try and find ways to make life easier for the autistic children and suggestions are, whenever possible, implemented in a very swift manner. I feel there is a constant search from both sides to try to get the best out of every child.

The VVA also works regionally, organizing lectures and very informative sessions with real professionals on the subject. It is always a chance to meet other parents/families and to hear tips and tricks to solve problem situations.

So, as far as Margot and us, is concerned, I think we have been assisted in the best way at every moment of our life.  As far as the future is concerned, that is a different question.  I think we will need to find an environment that will be autism/ Margot friendly.  The only thing we can do now, is to try to get her professional skills as good as possible, and I think she is in the right school for this.  The autism awareness is growing, so we are hoping for the best.  Although sometimes the thoughts come in my mind, I try not to let it worry me too much and to take one day at the time.  I know she will be as ready as she can be when she comes out of this school, and there is not much we can do about the mentality of the economic society as a whole.

I think we will tackle the problem when it is getting a bit nearer.

But as I said, I think we have been very lucky.  Margot and we have been/and are still guided by people caring and with professional knowledge. I am sure that other people might tell a different story as waiting lists are getting longer over the years.

Bernadette Brassine (mama of Margot)